Sibling bond
The most important facts about sibling bonding at a glance
- A good sibling bond strengthens self-confidence, social skills and emotional security.
- Age, personality, family situation and parental contact influence the relationship.
- Parents can promote bonding by acting fairly, not comparing and seeing each child individually.
- Sibling bonding develops over time - periods of distance are also normal and are part of it.
Why the bond between siblings is so valuable
Siblings usually accompany each other through life for the longest time. They grow up together, experience many formative situations together and share a common origin story. Alongside parents, brothers and sisters are among the first important caregivers. Children experience support and closeness in their relationship with their siblings, they learn to endure conflicts and to come together again after arguments. From an early age, they experience how relationships grow and change. They often develop a deep emotional bond that will accompany them throughout their lives.
In this article, you can find out more about sibling bonding and what parents can do to promote a positive sibling relationship.
The effects of a good sibling bond
A stable sibling bond can strengthen children in many ways. Siblings give each other support in difficult situations and emotional security. In addition to the relationship with their parents, they experience a sense of belonging and connection to another person from an early age. This reliable relationship, which is usually perceived as "indissoluble", gives them security, strengthens their self-confidence and helps them to cope better with stress.
How does the sibling bond develop?
The bond between siblings grows through many small moments in everyday life: playing and laughing together, comforting and supporting each other, shared experiences and the feeling of "belonging together as a family".
Every relationship between siblings is different and not always equally strong at every stage of life. They change over the course of a lifetime. Most siblings are very close during childhood, while the need for separation often increases during puberty. As they grow older, the bond with siblings often becomes more intense again.
How the relationship between siblings develops depends on the interplay of a variety of factors. The following correlations are particularly frequently the focus of research:
How can parents promote a positive sibling bond?
Parents can do a lot to ensure that a positive sibling bond develops by seeing and appreciating each child for who they are. You should refrain from showing favoritism and making comparisons.
Children react sensitively to unfair treatment by their parents. It can put a strain on the relationship between the children. However, it is not important that all siblings are always treated exactly the same, regardless of age and needs, but that each child gets what they need. If children experience that their parents make an effort to make good and appropriate decisions for each child, this can reduce feelings of competition, arguments and envy between siblings.
A close bond cannot be forced - but it can grow when children feel seen. As a parent, you can contribute to sibling bonding at various stages:
The sibling bond can blossom at many times
Not every sibling relationship is close right from the start. Sometimes the bond only develops later - for example, when children get older and discover shared interests, in special life situations or when roles within the family change. Periods of distance are also normal. Sibling bonding is a process that continues to develop over the course of a child's life.
Where can we find help and advice?
If siblings strongly dislike each other, conflicts have a major impact on everyday family life or a child seems clearly stressed, it can make sense to seek support. Family counseling centers offer guidance and help. You can find contact points in your area via Mein Famillienlotse.