Lovesickness

We all know: When the first great love breaks up, the heartache is immense. The whole world suddenly threatens to come crashing down just when you're still riding on rosy clouds. Parents can't protect teenagers from this experience. But there are ways in which you can comfort your child through this painful experience.

When you're newly in love, you have butterflies in your stomach. Lots of happiness hormones are released, creating a special feeling of elation. If the first crush is not reciprocated or if it suddenly ends, even though everything seemed so perfect just a moment ago, the feelings suddenly plummet. Even if the first tender relationship was only brief - violent outbursts of emotion, anger, sadness, despair, denial and total withdrawal are typical reactions. Hardly any other feeling at this age is more painful than heartbreak.

Typical symptoms of lovesickness include

• Unwellness
• Sadness
• Wine cramps
• Loss of appetite
• Migraines
• Mood swings
• Aggression
• Insomnia
• Concentration problems

Of course, you suffer when your child is unhappy and distraught over broken love. But you also know that this important experience is part of development and that children grow from it. The most important piece of advice is: Be a serious partner for your child and don't play down or ridicule the heartbreak. Messages such as "Cheer up, life goes on" certainly won't go down well when your child is feeling devastated. Now is the time for compassion! Show your daughter or son your understanding and be lenient with emotional outbursts at first. Perhaps comforting words, a hug or a conversation about how mom or dad experienced their first heartbreak will help. What your child needs most now is security and love to slowly rebuild their shattered self-esteem. It also helps to ensure as much normality as possible in everyday life. School, hobbies, sport and friends are the best ways to distract them from their grief.

Coming to terms with heartbreak is much more difficult for today's generation than it used to be. The reason for this is social networks. Shared photos on digital channels are not just a click away and many young people also find it difficult to consistently delete messages on their smartphones. Even worse, social media can be used to find out what your "ex" is thinking, feeling or doing at any time. This makes it particularly difficult to forget the love of your life. Experts therefore advise breaking off all contact, even virtually, until the emotional wounds have healed.

As a rule, teenage heartache subsides after a few weeks. Nevertheless, parents should remain vigilant during this time. Depressive moods, excessive aggression and persistent refusal to eat can be worrying signs that the heartbreak is having more serious consequences. You should seek professional help, especially if your child is taking pills or alcohol, eating too little or too much or exercising excessively.