Promoting Resilience

Reliable relationships are the foundation of resilience. When children feel accepted and supported by their parents, grandparents, or other important caregivers, it gives them a sense of security and strengthens their self-confidence. Also, encourage positive relationships with friends their own age.

When children feel accepted regardless of their performance or mistakes, it builds their self-confidence. Praise your child for their efforts, regardless of the outcome. Appreciate their personality, accept their weaknesses, and show them: “You’re good just the way you are.”

Give your child your full attention when they talk about their feelings. Listen, ask gentle questions, and take their worries, anger, or fears seriously. This will help your child learn to recognize and make sense of their own emotions and, over time, cope with them better. Understanding responses and genuine interest convey a sense of security and strengthen your child’s trust—in you and in themselves.

Children develop a sense of self-efficacy when they realize, “I can make a difference.” Even small successes in everyday life foster this feeling: For example, let a younger child put on their own jacket, even if it might take a little longer. For an older child, it can be a bigger challenge—like a difficult climbing wall that they conquer on their own while you stay nearby to offer support. 

It’s important to trust children to handle age-appropriate tasks and to allow for failure. Only then can they learn that not everything works out on the first try, but that challenges can still be overcome.

Give your child the opportunity to solve problems on their own, even if the answer may seem obvious to you right away. Questions like “What might help you right now?” or “How would you like to approach this?” encourage children to come up with their own ideas and tackle challenges on their own. This helps them learn that they can handle difficult situations independently and, step by step, gain more confidence in their own abilities.

Show your child that it’s okay to seek support. When you talk about problems, ask for help, and work together to find solutions, you’ll realize: “I don’t have to do everything on my own—there are people who will help me.”

Clear agreements provide guidance and reassurance. Talk openly with your child about boundaries and rules, and agree together on consequences in case these aren’t followed. Also, make time regularly to look back together on challenges you’ve successfully overcome: When children recognize what helped them in difficult situations, it strengthens their confidence in their own abilities and helps them tackle future problems with self-assurance.

Parents are important role models when it comes to dealing with stress. They don’t always have to appear strong or have an immediate solution for every problem. On the contrary: Children should see that adults, too, sometimes feel fear, worry, or uncertainty. What matters most is how they deal with it. Those who openly discuss their feelings, accept challenges, and at the same time seek constructive solutions instill confidence—and thereby also strengthen the child’s trust in their own ability to cope.